Behind the Curve
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
Monday, March 29, 2004
I don't get it...
Why is it that my cube-mate can have entire non-audible conversations with someone on his cell phone, but everyone I ever call wants me to speak up?
Don’t wanna. The guy behind me does enough of that for, well, this entire wing of the building.
Meanwhile...
Weirdly, the week I deleted R’s number from my cell phone, he e-mails me. Not sure if I still like him. Not sure if I ever liked him. Well, whatever.
Oh! I escaped Scrabble because L. couldn’t find the board. Yay!
OK, I admit I have read "Word Freak," the book about competitive Scabble players. Man, are they a dysfunctional bunch.
Spent this Sunday at the new school sanding spackle and coating walls with primer and paint. Mostly around the baseboards, but I did give the ceilings a shot. Sadly, my arms are too short, not to mention my torso and legs. Now, I am sore.
Afterwards, though, some of the boys brought some really awesome triple chocolate cake to the bar for us.
Words cannot describe...
So Liberace was the special guest villain on Friday’s episode of Batman. Dude, LIBERACE. He played a pair of evil twins. This marks one of the only times that the villain somehow managed to be more flamboyantly foppish than Batman and Robin. Then Our Heroes managed to escape a giant piano-music-roll-perforating machine by singing REALLY BADLY.
Friday, March 26, 2004
Friends!
Uridium & Cavedwellers will be in town next weekend. I shall have to be extra nice to them after they took care of me in SF.
Hey, it’s never a real wedding until the head bridesmaid gets drunk, makes out with a stranger in an alleyway , does shots with the bride’s father and is horribly ill next to the glowering Spawn suit.
Still got (some) moxie
We pinched some boards and broke them last night. Broke 2 with standing sidekick. Would have liked to have broken 3, but we didn't want our theft to be too obvious.
L. wants to get a massage and then play Scrabble tonight. Huh? I'm all for being massaged, but I haven't played Scrabble since 1996... for a reason. Maybe by the time we're done being rubbed down, she will be too relaxed for word games. I hope.
I did set up the VCR to record Batman, though, just in case. I think tonight's episode features a famous pianist, his evil twin brother, and some banshees.
Tuesday, March 23, 2004
FATE
Why is it that whenever I order a banana split, the establishment is always out of bananas?
I shall order sundaes from now on.
Hi Ross
gl?$r day, I took advantage of public domain works posted on www.litrix.com/titles.htm, and read Sheridan Le Fanu’s Green Tea.
This is short story written in 1872 about a man who drank too much green tea and was subsequently haunted by an EVIL MONKEY SPIRIT. No, really.
If I ever front a folk music band or a team of super-villains, we will call ourselves THE EVIL MONKEY SPIRITS. Unlikely, but anything is possible, and it is best to be prepared.
According to Shaenon, there is actually an online comic based on Green Tea, which can be found here http://usscatastrophe.com/kh/greentea.html.
I am scared.
Monday, March 22, 2004
What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
Bought new towels today. This is good, because I only have two towels, stolen from a hotel 3 years ago. They're in pretty sad shape these days. And then...
R (2). contacted me today, after 4 months of silence. True, he's the first man to ever actually fuck me on a dining room table, but still. It's not like it was a particularly nice table.
I can just imagine R (1) saying that he can't really blame the man. But I can, and really ought to.
Drat...
I failed to catch Saturday's episodes of Batman. I was so looking forward to seeing Vincent Price as Egghead. That's okay. I have procured a copy of Adam West's Back to the Batcave autobiography through Amazon. Meanwhile, here is my Ode to Alfred the butler...
The Butler Did It (Alfred Has a Plan)
I know! I have a master plan
I’ll be the greatest villain
This town has ever seen
I don’t run like a girl
I don’t wear periwinkle tights
I have dignity and prowess,
And I know karate!
(Oos!)
Tae Kwon-do!
All I need’s a mask!
In very basic black!
These exploding hors d'oeuvres should do the trick!
(Deviled eggs!)
That jalapeño kick!
I…
Will never have to clean my room again!
Will never have to clean my room again!
Will never have to clean my room again!
How will they know
It was me?
Wednesday, March 17, 2004
Non-culture
Finished reading Angels & Demons, which is slick and fun, but now I never need to read The Da Vinci Code. Started on And the Band Played On instead. It’s scary and sad and uplifting, I suppose.
In the wake of the terrorist bombings in Spain, I’m questioning the pros and cons of a powerful central government vs. stronger state governments. Republican vs. Federalist, I suppose. I know this is too simplistic, but our country is so huge and our government so sprawling that we the people are losing our sense of personal responsibility for, well, anything.
Have missed the 2nd Queer Eye in 2 weeks. My roommates taped it, but who has the time? Then I tried to come up with my perfect TV lineup and came up with this:
1) Batman (the 1960’s version, of course) – It’s on TV Land! Plus, see this website! http://members.tripod.com/~AdamWest/index.htm
2) Teen Titans – It’s on Cartoon Network! God, I’m a geek!
3) The New York 1 news programming. Local news. It’s useful.
4) The Apprentice. These people seem to say almost nothing useful, and yet they’re all so arrogant. I’ve worked with people like that. I hate them all. Another show I always miss.
5) Scrubs. I’ve only seen about 5 episodes, but I laughed at them all. One of my favorite shows to always miss.
6) Queer Eye – it’s still funny, damn it. Even though , yes, I always miss it. There will always be reruns.
7) Er…Justice League? I always miss it.
8) Random pop culture shows on VH1. They’re incredibly shallow, and I’m getting old.
9) What ever happened to Vacant Lot?
10) And Comic Strip Live?
But this happens every morning
Standing on the subway platform is a bit like standing on a mountain ledge; I always think about jumping. This is an idle thought, not even a temptation, and in no way spawned by any sadness.
Thursday, March 04, 2004
Wednesday, March 03, 2004
Curious
It is an odd thing to have slept with a 37-year-old divorced father of two several times, and yet still have no idea what his sons' names are.
Of course I'm curious, but I didn't want him to feel I was prying.
Stop singing...
Well, I finally finished reading The Lord of the Rings trilogy. They do seem to improve, from being the most boring books ever to being not quite the most boring books ever. The speed of the narrative flow is inversely proportional to the number of songs per book, I think.
Italian leather sofa?
New Queer Eye last night. Pretty OK. I have a feeling that I'm more clueless (and sloppier!) than all these guys, but I'll let that go.
OK
He went easy on us. Is this because he's mellowing out, or because we're obviously pathetic and can't take any more?
Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Monday, March 01, 2004
The Girl with the Most Cake
The new Courtney Love album is not bad, even though I keep thinking that every song she writes is about Kurt. She’s putting out some sort of comic book with TOKYOPOP. She’s marrying people actually, as a prize for some sort of web contest. Yes, she’s one scary chick.
"You’re the Best… Around!"
An odd martial arts moment: We were all at Frederico’s pizza place when we realized that instead of sports, the TV over the bar was showing "The Karate Kid" without sound. We were all immediately transfixed by the evil Cobra Kai, baby-faced Ralph Macchia, and the incredibly lame fight scenes. I started singing to the theme music in my head.
That horrible crane kick!
